Tag Archives: uni

Got my interview tomorrow…

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scary. exciting. awesome. nervous. worried. thoughtful. worried…

jeez. I hope I get in. I mean, its not likely that they’d turn me away unless I was really really horrible right????? right?

and now from reading Kay’s comment, starting to frak myself out…again. what if I dont get a job straight out? well. theres a few options… always has been. well more recently especially.

  1. Teaching History and English
  2. Museum Curating
  3. Historian working for some kind of company
  4. Historian writing books
  5. Historian doing research…somewhere for something
  6. Do my masters…
  7. Be a librarian
  8. Be a professional traveller
  9. Work in retail
  10. work in a bookstore
  11. and… if theres absolutely nothing around…I’ve worked in real scummy places before…like that old yucky fish and chip store…am surprised it stayed open for so long!

so yeah. have a few options…but, god. hope I get in.

think I should write down what im good at, why I like kids and why I want to teach. will divulge more tomorrow. but yes. very exciting! wish me luck!!! :)

I’m Gonna Get a Job…

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straight out of university. it cant be that hard. I mean, even with everyone talking about how difficult the job market is right now, it shouldnt be too hard to find something..

If you’re determined enough and have connections in the right place from networking and being social with people, its not too hard to find a good job.

so many of my friends, and I love you to pieces, have finished uni and havent mnaged to find a job yet. now im not saying theyre not determined enough, maybe theyre just not happy with what they want to do, or dont know who to contact to find a good job.

so far, I’m happy with my degree, im excited about the possibilities of palces I can go to and I’m very happy with how things are going.

If something shit happens, well, I’ve been through enough now to know how to pull myself back together and get on with things… so I’m sure I’ll be ok.

Life is for living. for experiences and im so excited to live that I cant wait to get out and just do it. truly :)

at the moment, an essay is staring me in the face waiting me for me to do it, and yet, I hear restaurant city game from facebook playing, and am writing in this instead.

but this little blog i have got going at the moment, liberates me. frees me. from oppression of my own mind, my own pressures and releases me into my dreams and the great beyond, where I and everyone else has potential and can go far. very far. I’m excited :)

I have a degree..woah.

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so I finally realised today, that I have a degree. not quite in my hands, but I have graduation next month. this is scary,

  1. because that means people will think im a real “qualified” historian/english academic now
  2. I’ll have to do something with it
  3. It’s taken a lot to get me here
  4. I’m proud of myself
  5. My family is proud of me
  6. I will be able to give back to the community and to my whanau and my iwi

Its important that I’ve realised. because now that I have, I can look forward to the future

a few things to remember from the maori graduates conference from the past two days, (which was amazing by the way! we have some real talent at waikato uni)

  • you will never be clever. you will only ever be a learner all your life
  • once your mind has been stretched it cant go back to being ignorant and small again
  • pro-vice maori office are freaking mean organisers
  • everyone needs to have a vision of what they want for their work, life and their whanau and then the world
  • everyone needs to try to the best of their ability
  • everyone needs to give back.

I’m more passionate about studying now. i wish I’d been allowed to go to those things when I was an under-grad.

I’m growing up. times are changing, some things stay the same, but ultimately, things are good and things are going really well.

 

oh and ambers party went off and we had ANOTHER wicked time in town…perhaps i shouldnt have mixed so much of those wines. but thats the first time since i started drinking again that i had a yuck feeling, just from being sick a little. but thats my own fault, no-one elses really.

and made a good some up today walking home… its got lots of …and you! … and… and i said… and i say…. things like that :) hehe

 

allie xoxox

Workload

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Normally, I leave everything til the last minute possible. For once..I’m actually trying to stay on top of it.

I got an A- for my presentation. yup. I so did. maybe this whole honours thing is really letting me spread my wings, away from all the annoying talkative people in my old history and english classes, and actually forcing me to think myself, be put on the spot and say the things I actually think.

Now dont get me wrong, this is pretty scary. But its good. I’m really enjoying being part of a collective, a smaller group of actual academics…and I’m actually thinking bout doing a masters topic. which is really scary…but scary in different ways. Actually having a research topic idea…now that i can work on all year next year…as I’m still planning on doing teaching next year…thats if they want me.

I love my class. All my classes. Maybe thats why I’m enjoying it so much, coz I’m actually really passionate about what I’m learning.

It does scare me a little though. Like when I went back to my old school, and these kids asked me this really random out-of the blue question…expecting it to be answered… sure. I’m the academic now, so surely I have a whole heap of answers…

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Just thought I’d Say hi.

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Had a mini melt down. not too bad. am ok, and back onto the designated path. :) more importantly, am allocating myself some down time. to read a real book for once. not some history or english designated “have to read” books… but a good, relaxing book to read before sleeping. and so. I’m about to do it. hopefully I dont fall asleep before i get into the first couple of pages.

also. the trip up to the Waikato Hospital was awesome today. their gudex library was amazing…and the medical objects were as creepy as I thought they’d be, but were definately displayed differently than I though they would be. so thats cool am looking forward to my interview with peter rothwell if he’ll do it with me,
and of course, the one with A. :) ethics and all :)

of course, I have to get on to my actual research due next week…but yeah. thought I’d say hi to everyone :) xoxox. and goodnight. am so excited to read a real book. yay! night! :)

Identity Crisis

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I’ve always seen myself as me. A girl who was brought up with knowing about her heritage and her whakapapa. I’m of maori anf french descent, and consider myself as being a strong and straight up person about who I am.

I am now realizing that people judge me the minute they meet me. It sucks, but this is what they do.

I had initial worries about this when I was considering whether or not I was going to do oral histories, mainly of maori people. Theres a whole lot of ethical and moral issues about this that I wont go into right now about this, which led me to the decision that I am who I am, and people will judge me no matter who I try to percieve myself as being.

I get that. Well, I thought I did.

At the moment, I’m a kaiawhina as I study at Uni. I love my uni. Not many univeristies have maori signposts under the english ones around I’m told. To me, thats just something normal and expected. I expect the bi-multi0lingual status we have here at Waikato. It’s refreshing, and its how things are done.

As a kaiawhina, I help out maori students who are enrolled in history and english papers that I’ve taken myself, throughout my degree.

Now that I’m finished my degree YAY! I am able to focus on my honours and graduate level papers, which I’m enjoying immensely.

But back to being a kaiawhina. As a kaiawhina, each and every new semester I have to go into peoples classes and introduce myself. Over the semester I email, and ring them all up to let them know about upcoming assignments, events we are planning and just to see how theyre doing throughout the semester.

Its like the second or third week in to semester already…I think. and already I’ve been in to most of the classes I’m going to be taking care of this semester.

Instantly, when I walk in…I’m being judged. Heres some girl. Whys she here? Whats kaupapa mean? why is she singling out maori students? shes a pakeha chick etc etc etc.

Now heres my dilemma. I have some scripted things I have to say when I go into these classes, like how we are primarily here to help maori students and so therefore it makes sense that I only have the maori students email addresses.

Alot of the people who see and judge me want to know where I’m coming from. Who I am etc.

I just want to help students. I love and am very passionate about history and english, and just want students to get the most out of their degree. If I can help in some way, then all the better aye!

I obviously will help any student who needs my help. They just have to come up to my office! when I’m in haha :) but its not hard to flick me an email or something.

 

anyways. thats my rant for now.  I’m just a pakeha looking girl with a big ole hearty maori heart :) and it sucks when people look down at me for any reason. so damn hard to be accepted for who I am and for I want to be seen as being :)

Wasting Time When I Have Better Things to Do OR Should Be Doing Something More Creative or Worth Something!

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So. The title may not mean much, but it actually does. This is a really long post. Feel free to read on. It’s mostly about money and flatting and uni and my last two years. Hmmm. It is actually slightly insightful haha :) if anyone needs to know how to live off 20 cents, they should read this :)

Allie xoxox

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